The World is Harsh

I put myself in her shoes
And I realized
The world is harsh.
I couldn’t solve it -
Her problems
Or the world’s problems either
And neither would “they”
That evasive “they” -
The ones that control everything
And talk to me in my head.
I think too much
I love too much
That is why I’m broken today
Pondering, noticing, wondering, questioning
​Always the big questions - again and again.
I’ve been inspired 
From all the right places
But also by fear -
Fear of trains - yes, from Germany
Fear of the dark.
Where is my optimism on a day like this?
Where is my hope when I am deeply depressed?
I can’t do anything right
I can’t even smile
Bored
Sleeping too much
Work is tedious
Passions have run dry.
I can only think to light another cigarette
And await the change I’m itchin’ for
Maybe tomorrow the world will brighten up.